We at “3S – Sex, Sensation and Scandal” have managed to bring our readers an exclusive interview with the elusive Ms Y! (Please ignore any slander propagated by “Bed and Battle” that there were any bribes paid, politicans arm-twisted or favours exchanged to bring you this scoop. It is just sour grapes).
Not that there is any dearth of speculation about Ms Y in the news. The media has doggedly covered the sensational buildup right from the time she was admitted into rehab the first time. All the elements of a racy drama were present – youth, love, betrayal, revenge – and the public had lapped it up, and kept the media houses afloat during this time of recession. It was 8 months back that the judicial system had been rocked out of its sleepy complacency and new cyber laws had been created. The brutal murder of a beautiful mistress by an equally attractive wife has sent the world reeling. To top it all, it has all happened online! On Facebook, to be specific.

We caught up with the lady behind the sensation at her modest home in a remote corner of town in an attempt to reveal the shocking truths.

3S: When did your cyber journey begin?
Ms Y:  As a little girl I was always fascinated by the internet. Unlike my friends at school I did not have a smartphone, neither did we have a wifi connection at home. I would sit for hours trying to connect through dial-up on a pc. By the time Facebook was launched I was a regular in all the popular chatrooms and already had 526 “friends”. I had even met 243 of them face-to-face.

3S: Were you shy at that time? Did you have a happy home life?
Ms Y:  It was alright I guess, nothing very different from what others go through. I was an okay student, and my parents were busy with their jobs so they didnt bother me much thankfully. I used to be shy but the cyber world really helped me open up and get rid of my inhibitions. Strangely, although I did not have much to say for myself in the company of people, I was a sparkling conversationalist online. Of course the emoticons helped. And I had set up my webcam so that all the right angles were captured…back in those days PhotoStore wasa not so popular.

3S: So you met your husband online?
Ms Y:  Of course, where else? Thats how most people who didnt have much going on in ‘real’ life become friends. But I had very strict standards – do you know I did not lose my e-virginity till I was 20? My husband was very impressed by that and I think thats what attracted him to me initially.

3S: So you got married 2 years back…were you happy?
Ms Y :  We were blissfully happy initially. It was an e-ceremony as you know – facebook had just launched their matrimonial services officially. For months we would discuss nothing but the wedding and all the planning, especially the wardrobe. We held an online contest to select the best photographer, after all its the most important aspect of the whole thing. Our wedding website got 4209 hits and the wedding album on facebook got 2076 “Likes”!
3S: Err impressive! you had so many “Friends”?
Ms Y:  I added all his friends as soon as we became engaged…his “friendlist” was even more than mine so now I was even more “popular”. I had unknown people liking all my photos and it was like becoming a celebrity overnight after years of loneliness. It was actually why I got married – he was a good provider in every sense of the term.

3S: What happened next?
Ms Y:  I suppose it started losing its charm. Slowly our pictures started getting lesser “comments”…it was as if people had lost interest in our lives and I couldn’t bear it. Where previously a single picture would generate around 100 “Likes” there were just 30 or so now. We had nothing in common anymore. And I noticed he was losing interest in me. Previously within seconds of me putting a status update he would “Like” it and then call me to tell me how sweet it was. Now weeks would go by before he even noticed a new profile picture. Suddenly he was acting like PDA was a bad thing whereas that had been our initial bonding factor. I remember he made some nasty comments on one of my pics…I cried for days till he deleted it. Thats when that bitch must have entered his life. Lured him in with all her PhotoStored pictures the slut! I started spending the whole day online stalking them. Thats when he framed me for addiction and shut me up in (r)e-hab. 3 straight months without any Facebook access so I couldn’t see what they were up to.

3S: You were one of the first persons to go into (r)e-hab. Was that painful?
Ms Y:  It was the most difficult test I have ever faced in life. There were days when I thought I wouldn’t be able to make it. But I was determined to come back into the e-world…at the end of the day it was all I had ever had, all I knew.

3S: You were doing fine after the first (r)e-hab stint. What caused you to give in again?
Ms Y:  Her of course. She knew I had restricted hours for facebook, and would taunt me with messages on what she would be doing with my husband after I logged off. She even put up semi-nude pictures of them together on their e-versary…what hurt most was it was the same day as our e-gagement. That was the last straw and I snapped.

3S: So thats when you…err…took action?
Ms Y:  Yes. One of my million online friends was a hacker. He had proposed to me several times and would tag me in all his pictures with cute puppies and sentimental messages. I am not proud of it, but I agreed to comment on all his pictures if he would hack her profile for me and change her facebook status to “Deceased” and then put a status message that she was a husband-stealer and her profile pic was PhotoStored. She could not bear it and committed suicide. It was suicide I dont know why it is being portrayed as murder. The verdict was also suicide thanks to the ambiguity in cyber laws.

3S: What is the relationship like with your husband now?
Ms Y:  As you would know from my profile, “Its complicated”. There is a lot of history which just cant be thrown away – I alone have 72 albums to prove it, and he has another 56. You cant just walk away from all that. We have decided to try again, and have put up status messages to that effect so everyone is informed. The best surprise was on my birthday last week he put a status message wishing me and made the visibility “friends of friends” so that even her friends could see. I was really touched. So yeah, we are working on it.

3S: Any plans for the future?
Ms Y:  We have decided to have an e-child. We have already created a profile for it but kept the gender blank for now. I will be putting up pics of the ultrasound soon, please keep yourself subscribed to my page for all latest updates.

3S: That is wonderful indeed! Congratulations! And we will definitely want exclusive photo rights for the child.
Ms Y:  Ohh you will have to discuss with my husband…I think he is already in talks with some other e-zines also. We are not taking any money you know, we just like the free publicity after being sad nobodys all our lives.

3S: Of course, that is the greatness of this medium – you can be useless and yet have a huge fan following. Anyway, we would like to wish you all the best and hope you live happily ever after as a family.
Ms Y:  Thank you so much, and could you also send me the link to this interview so I can “share” it with my “friends”?